Are you looking to spice things up in the bedroom? Or is sex feeling monotonous or mundane? No one wants to be stuck in a rut when it comes to their sex life, but it is all too easy to fall into a routine. This is especially true for those who have been with the same partner for a long period of time. However, you don’t need to do anything crazy to spice up your sex life (unless you want to, of course.) Here are some easy ways that you can expand your sexual repertoire for both couples and singles looking to switch things up.
1. Lubricant
We’ll start out slow here and suggest trying out a lubricant. If you have not yet tried one, then this is an easy way to expand your sexual repertoire. If you or your partner produce enough lubricant naturally, you may be wondering why you should try one. Lubricant completely changes the feeling of whatever type of stimulation you are engaging in. It makes penetrative sex feel smoother, it makes handjobs more seamless, and it makes anal sex possible in most cases. Not to mention the variety that you have to choose from. There are tons of different formulas that are designed to do different things. For example, there are lubes that create warming or tingling sensations, lubes that increase blood flow to the area, and even lubes that are flavored. Try out a lube in partner or solo play for an easy way to switch things up.
2. Vibrator
Now let’s move onto something a little more adventurous. Anyone with a vagina should have a vibrator on hand. Even if you don’t really masturbate, a vibrator is a must for many women during sex with their partners. Women in general typically struggle to orgasm through penetrative sex alone. If you are in the majority here, a vibrator can be your ticket to the finish line. Use it on yourself during sex or hand it over to your partner and let them control your pleasure. There are countless options to choose from but you really can’t go wrong with a clitoral vibrator. They are perfect for partner or solo play and are usually small and discrete so you can take them just about anywhere.
3. Prostate Massager
This one is for the cis-guys out there (or anyone who was assigned male at birth). Did you know about the pleasure points in your prostate? There is a good chance that you have heard of the female G-spot, but allow us to introduce you to the male equivalent: the P-spot. The P-spot is located in the prostate and can be stimulated through penile penetration, through manual stimulation, or with a prostate massager.
Introducing a prostate massager into your bedroom is sure to not only increase your pleasure, but to also have more variety when it comes to your orgasms. Prostate-induced orgasms employ almost triple the muscles that a penile orgasm does, making for a more intense and pleasurable climax. And if you are tired of watching the ladies have all the fun with blended orgasms (where two areas are stimulated at the same time such as the G-spot and the clitoris), this is your ticket to achieving one for yourself. Use a hands free prostate massager to stimulate your P-spot while using your hands to stimulate your penis at the same time. You’ll thank us later.
4. An Extra Partner
If you are already experienced in the world of toys and personal lubricants, then you’ll have to look a bit further to expand your repertoire. Something fun that you can do as a couple is bring in a third person. Or if you are not in a relationship then you can always find two other willing participants for your three-some. Having a third person in the bedroom can be fun and exciting. There are tons of different things to try based on the gender combination in your three-some. Not to mention all the different ideas and styles that each individual brings to the table. There is no better way to spice up your sex life than by trying out a good old fashioned three-some!
Exploring Your Fantasies
Exploring fantasies and broadening your sex life can be freeing and fun, but it can seem daunting. Here are some ideas to spice it up:
- Role-play – experiment with personas you don’t usually express in real life. Explore dominance and submission, take turns as teacher and student, or go into a fantasy world.
- Tantric sex – practice poses to deepen connections, increase pleasure and intimacy, explore sensations, and be mindful.
- Toys – use them to enjoy each other’s bodies and stimulate multiple erogenous zones.
- Props and scenarios – incorporate costumes, props, or scenarios like boss/secretary. Get creative!
- Fetish – explore kinks/fetishes e.g bondage/spanking. Remember trust is key.
Communication and Consent
Good communication and consent are essential for any healthy sexual relationship. Before engaging in any new act, it’s important to talk about it. This ensures both parties are on the same page and comfortable. Respect your partner’s wishes – no means no.
Consent should be ongoing. Check-in with your partner during the entire sexual encounter. A verbal agreement is best. Also, don’t assume consent because someone doesn’t say no or offer resistance; especially if one person has more social power. Communication should remain open and respectful.
Besides consent, communication should cover fantasies, desires, boundaries, expectations etc. It may include difficult conversations about birth control and safer sex measures such as condoms or dental dams. Respect yourself and your partner; this will help everyone involved have a good time while keeping comfort levels in mind.
Come Into Your Sexual Power
Exploring your sex life is a great way to find new things that you may have not even realized that you like. Not to mention the confidence boost that stepping out of your comfort zone can give you. The suggestions that we have listed barely scratch the surface so keep an open mind and explore away!